5 Most Important Things to Know About How Sensory Overwhelm Can Impact Autistic People
Author’s Note: I am not a medical professional. I’m an autistic adult who has lived these struggles and observed their implications.
Autism is still a vastly misunderstood disorder. “Neurodiversity” and “asynchronous development” may not yet be part of the general public’s vocabulary, but these terms are among many defining elements of the autistic reality.
As an autistic adult, I still experience the exquisite discomfort of sensory overwhelm. For most people, overstimulation is fleeting. It comes and goes and then life goes on. For me, shutdown was a days-long consequence of extreme overwhelm.
The science behind stress and overwhelm helps explain why shutdown can be so debilitating. Your brain redirects resources to parts of the body that will be more conducive to getting you to safety. It doesn’t matter if the threat is real or perceived. Your body is going to do everything it can to keep you safe. Most people move through these elevated episodes quickly before returning to a state of relative calm.
For many autistic people, though, the baseline isn’t “calm.” It’s “safe…for now.” Sustaining fight or flight mode for years without interruption is enormously taxing. The physiological havoc this can wreak is staggering.
All that said, it’s vital that you understand just how traumatizing the world is for many people on the spectrum.
A quick note before I dive in: In my experience, autistic people are incredibly intelligent, highly capable individuals who, like just about every other human being on the planet, thrive under the right conditions. This article is meant to be the first step in creating those conditions and empowering the autistic people in your life to ask for what they need.
- If it’s too much, it’s too late.
One of the most insidious aspects of sensory overwhelm is how subtle it can be…until it’s not.
Many autistic people don’t have the luxury of private overwhelm. We often can’t compartmentalize or defer flight or flight mode. We may not realize that we’re overstimulated until we have a meltdown. By that point, though, your child is likely already screaming. It’s as surprising and upsetting for them as it is for you.
That’s what “If it’s too much, it’s too late” means. It’s not a hard rule, though. There are degrees to which overwhelm impacts us. Some feel it more acutely than others.
2. “Stimming” helps us cope with extreme anxiety and overwhelm.
Have you noticed your autistic child flapping their hands, making noises, or engaging in repetitive behaviors? This is called stimming.
I mentioned earlier that sensory overwhelm is a fight or flight response. Well, stimming is a coping strategy some autistic people use to self-regulate.
An important note about stimming: Sometimes, these coping strategies can take the form of unhealthy behaviors. Excessive eating is one of these. Don’t discourage these behaviors. Instead, help your child find healthier versions of these strategies. So for stimming by overeating, an alternative would be chewing gum.
3. Count your emotions among your senses.
For autistic people, emotions can be as oppressive and debilitating as the loudest car alarm or the most pungent fish market. We are highly sensitive beings in just about every way a person can be.
Most of my overwhelm as an adult stems from the intensity of my emotions. I grew out of the more traditional causes of overstimulation. Now, rather than fireworks shutting me down, it’s arguments with family, fights with friends, and turmoil within myself that can send me spinning.
Framing our emotions as bodily senses both honors the mind-body connection and helps validate just how powerful our feelings are. It also helps us find ways to process and manage these feelings so we can participate in society.
4. Surprises are subconsciously processed as betrayals.
Most autistic people I know don’t like surprises. They’ve used their rigidity to maintain control (or the illusion of it) over nearly every area of their lives. When every day is an assault on the senses, you seek control where you can because control keeps you safe.
Even the most well-intentioned surprises can send us spiraling. It’s important to remember just how careful we are with our emotional resources. Because surprises are so upsetting, we often subconsciously interpret them as betrayals. We process it as a violation of boundaries even though no harm was meant.
5. Being seen is a love language.
Most people value being seen but few think of it as a love language.
Feeling seen actually helps mitigate emotional overwhelm. Think about it: You feel safer and more relaxed around people who see and honor you. You let your guard down around people who respect you and establish themselves as emotionally safe individuals.
